Happy Hour: More Than A Funny Name

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Cheers!

This week the Clan Kenndey is celebrating the life of my late brother-in-law, Robert Sargent Shriver. And I do mean celebrating.  He was a friend in need and a pious man who wasn't above knocking back a pint or worshipping the creature with the rest of us.

Needless to say, the wake is still in progress. And will be so long as the whiskey holds out.

I won’t call Sargent a hero, ’cause what’s a hero? But sometimes, there’s a man – and I’m talkin’ about the Sarge here – sometimes, there’s a man, well, he’s the man for his time and place. He fits right in there. And that was the Sarge.

The Sarge came to us from outside.  My father felt sorry for him, took him in, and treated him as one of his own.  And we all grew to look at Sarge as our brother.  Everyone liked the Sarge. His natural self-depreciating manner and willingness to endure our constant womanizing made him welcome on all our nocturnal adventures. He was not the kind of man who naturally made enemies.

He was the perfect complement to my ambitious and bellicose father and brothers. Where John was coldly calculating and ruthless, and Bobby prone to violent action, Sarge was the voice of reason. Often playing devil's advocate, and searching for a resolution that didn't involve bribes or eliminating troublemakers.  He was the ultimate team player and a gentle man who knew when and how to keep his mouth shut. He tolerated all of our shenanigans, and made the Kennedy administration more respectable.

Politics were never Sarge's thing, but since it was the Family business, he knew that he'd have to endure it.  His first real taste of it came in 1964 when that hammer-headed Texan, LBJ, wanted him as running mate.  Bobby quickly put a stop to that, saying, "There's not going to be a Kennedy on the ticket. And if there were, it would be me." Naturally Johnson was terrified of Bobby and so he backed off and settled for that pile of dirty rags, Hubert.  At that point Sarge went to visit LBJ to make sure that he understood the Way Things Are, and that he shouldn't try to carry a grudge. 

Then there was that time in '72, when Senator McGovern's running mate, Tom Eagleton, had to leave the campaign in disgrace after the press found out he had undergone electro-shock therapy for major depression. Tom hadn't bothered to tell McGovern, whose judgement now appeared to be dodgy and whose campaign was well and truly sunk.  In desperation, McGovern reached out to us for help.  Once again, Sarge stepped in and, even though it was a doomed move, Sarge agreed to do McGovern a favor and be his running mate.  And, when McGovern was whipped like a runaway slave, the Sarge stayed on to comfort him, while reminding him that he now had an obligation to the Family.

Both John and Bobby were sincere in their desire to make the Kennedy Family completely legitimate by  helping the coloreds and the poor, but being Kennedys, they really had no idea what to do.  For us, being poor meant only being able to afford buying a municipal election.  Sarge was different.  He seemed to have this strange connection to the less fortunate, and while John and Bobby were giving lip-service to helping out, the Sarge did something.  He was the heart and the concious of our organization. He founded Headstart, the Peace Corps, and Vista. He was so diplomatic and tolerant that he even served as ambassador to France for two years.

Sarge was our conscience, our humility and our gentleness.  He was our consiglieri.

So, hoist a glass and drink to the Sarge with me.

Bottoms up!

Happy Hour: Bush Tax Cuts Get Donkey Punched

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Cheers!

You know, it's been tough trying to be positive about how my fellow Democrats have been doing in congress lately. We get clobbered in the mid-term elections ceding control of the House and having the Senate majority trimmed to a sparse majority of 53. We manage to pass a watered-down version of the revolutionary healthcare bill, but Don't Ask-Don't Tell is not yet repealed; the DREAM Act hasn't yet seen the light of day; Clean Energy continues to be hobbled by big business interests; and we still have combat troops in both Iraq and Afghanistan.

It's enough to make a guy take up drinking, so it's a good thing I've been doing it for a while.

However, every now and then something happens that brings a smile to my face, and reaffirms my belief that today's Democratic Party actually stands for something, the way it used to when my brothers ran the show. Today was one of those days when the Donkeys in the House of Representatives took a collective sip of courage, stood up to the bullying of the Republicans, and voted to reject the extension of the Bush tax cuts for the wealthy, while keeping the current cuts for middle-class and working Americans in place.

This is a significant show of spine by the Dems not seen since Tip O'Neill would stomp through the House commissary, drinking other fellas' milkshakes. And, it calls the bluff on the GOP, who held working-class Americans hostage by threatening to oppose the extension of the unemployment benefits for long-term out of work Americans unless the rich got their tax cut. 

Naturally, the Republicans will squeal like stuck pigs about this.  They'll lie about how the Democrats want to hike taxes and spread fear about how this is going to further harm the economy.  Their argument has been that giving the wealthy their tax cut stimulates the economy because as the wealthy spend their money it will create jobs.  What they don't say is that the wealthy will use the extra money to buy monocles, light their cigars with $100 bills, and pay whores to indulge their unspeakable repressed perversions.

Republicans will also just ignore the fact that passing this tax cut extension while simultaneously extending the unemployment benefits would really kill the economy by increasing the defecit even further.  They'll also forget to mention that we've already been enjoying this tax break for the past 6 years or so, and it hasn't yet resulted in job growth or economic prosperity.

In fact, we've already had about 30 years of this nonsense and the economy (for regular Americans) has been steadily deteriorating since "Trickle Down" was first introduced by Reagan in 1980. It didn't work then, and it's not going to magically work now.

Which begs the question: why are the Republicans so eager to see the cut extended? 

Well, there's the fact that the people who would benefit most from this extension are the ones pulling the strings of the GOP.  But that's only part of it.  They know quite well that extending the tax cuts is a bum deal that would ruin the economy and leave the US in even worse shape two years from now.  In fact, they're counting on it.  They realize that their best chance to unseat Obama in 2012 will be if the economy has continued to deteriorate.  So they are more than willing to inflict more hardship if it buys them the presidency.

So, now the ball is in the Repubicans' court.  The Democrats have found their pride and that's worth toasting. So raise a glass with me.

Bottoms Up!

Happy Hour: Oil's Well That Ends Well

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Cheers!

You can count me as one of New Orleans' biggest fans.  I've long appreciated the sweaty charm of the Big Easy.  Many is the time I've spent lost weekends in it's dusky embrace, bathed in the spicy musk of creole sensuality and alcohol-fueled enthusiasm.

So, naturally, seeing the area once again be threatened with a devastating disaster is very difficult for me to take.  The only time one should smell petroleum in New Orleans is if you pay good money for the privilege.

Make no mistake, the spill need not have been this bad.  While in the Senate, I was one of the most fervent voices for regulating the oil industry  - but a procession of Republican presidents and congresses disagreed,  result in BP getting approval to drill in the Gulf of Mexico without the required Environmental Impact Assessment study, or commitments to safety and redundant back-up systems in case of accident.  You know, the kind of hands-off approach the Republican Party support in their "Drill, Baby, Drill" zeal.

Not surprisingly, conservatives are now stumbling over themselves to try and gain some level of distance between themselves and their greasy monster, while others are spouting the Orwellian claim that somehow this is the fault of the Democrats and President Obama – going so far as to call this “Obama’s Katrina” as if the two events had anything in common aside from geography.  The absurdity is astonishing.  How Hurricane Katrina in 2005 parallels with the current situation is something even a dozen or so belts of whiskey doesn’t explain.  The Hurricane was a disaster that directly impacted the city and it’s residents, demanding swift federal response in terms of emergency, health, evacuation, and housing support.  The oil spill requires none of these, yet even so Obama and the government are monitoring the situation and have offered support as needed.

The Bush administration's inactivity during Hurricane Katrina showed them to be completely over-matched and unprepared.  Although it was known well before landfall that Katrina would be a devastating storm, there were no preliminary efforts made by the federal government to have some sort of support or emergency response contingency in effect.  When the storm hit and the nation watched a city drown before their eyes Bush did his best impression of Nero, picking and strumming a guitar with a total disregard for the people suffering.   It was only a week after the fact that Bush arrived in New Orleans for a few clumsily staged photos trying to make him seem engaged and concerned.

Yet still the republican wags are blaming Obama for not donning his cape and using his super-powers to stop the leak himself.  It’s almost as if they are calling for the federal government to step in, take over for the company, and handle every aspect of the containment and clean-up – from the cost to the manpower.  These are the same people who yowled like stuck pigs at the idea of the government providing healthcare to those unable to get it for themselves.

But even more amazing is how the right are suddenly using Katrina as a pejorative, after claiming (with a straight face) that Bush did nothing wrong.  How can the perfectly acceptable actions of Bush during the hurricane suddenly be held as some sort of low-water mark for Obama?  Can it be that even republican expectations for Bush were so low that his not visibly pissing his pants and drooling on television was considered successful?

In any case, this disaster has had at least one bright side:  it’s caused  Sarah Palin to go into hiding.

Bottums Up!